How long? Always!

Best Sleeping Medication Known to Man or Womankind!!

Well I didn't get many answers to last week's question so I will post my views first and then finish up with the answers I got from others. The question was how long have you been into spanking, when did you first realize your feelings and then when did you start actually participating.

As with so many of my spanko friends I don't remember a time when I wasn't intrigued with spanking. I was not spanked as a child but my brother was severely spanked and quite often. I hated that, you could hear his screams even if you were outside. I often sat and wondered how I could want the same thing to happen to me.

The answer, of course, is I didn't. They may have called what they were doing to him spanking, but I doubt that anyone in or out of the lifestyle would consider what he had to endure as spanking. And so my kinky little brain continued its quest for someone to spank me. It has only been very recently that I have remembered some of the role play games my teenage friends and I played. Its hard to believe I forgot about this, it was such an essential part of our social time together.

My girlfriends and I pretended we each lived with our older brother. Our parents usually were traveling or had jobs that kept them away from home, therefore our older brother's were usually assigned to take care of us. Keep in mind that all of us were the oldest child in the family and none of us had older brothers at all. We all wanted one, or maybe even two, but unfortunately they had to be the stuff fantasies are made of. Since we were typical teen agers we were consistently getting into low level trouble. Breaking curfew, skipping a class, and sometimes not doing homework were the heinous crimes of which we were usually accused. Of course our brothers all had a tried and true method of dealing with this....Spanking! Never in the history of the world were teen agers in the Chicago suburbs spanked so thoroughly and repeatedly. Our poor brothers barely had time to study for school, they were so involved in warming our backsides.

Much of our role play was done on the phone but the times we were together we actually spanked one another. I still wonder if any of them think of this and if any have embraced the fact that they are spankos. There is no doubt in my mind they were and most likely still are.

So until recently I thought it had only been the last six years in which I had begun to explore this wonderful part of my life. Actually it has been much longer. It is also very interesting to note that our brother's were very loving and caring. The spankings were always "for our own good" and we were never shouted at or slapped.

Spanking has always been a part of my fantasy world, sometimes sexual and sometimes not. However, from the time I graduated from high school until I reawakened that part of myself was 36 years. That is one very long dry spell! I always tried to get any guy I went out with to spank me but it never worked. My ex husband wasn't interested either. One relationship I had about 12 years ago, he was more than willing to punch and beat me but thought spanking was weird.

Then one day my brother bought me a used computer since he knew I was writing and he felt I needed a computer. Boy was he right, but for the wrong reasons. The first day I typed spanking into the search engine life became a lot more interesting. I devoured stories, joined groups, blushed as I pictured myself in some of the situations described, and learned as much as I could about this lifestyle I was sure would never be mine.

I was wrong about that too, it most certainly has become an unbelievably important part of my life. Almost every implement on my "no way" list has been tried out more than once. I once doubted I could be spanked bare bottom by someone I had just met, so much for silly doubts. I have been spanked in public play rooms at spanking parties. Probably the most astonishing thing I found out about myself is that I am a switch. I enjoy spanking both men and women for corrective reasons or simply for fun.

Here is what I have learned that will keep spanking an important part of my life always. Spanking is one of the major conduits through which I feel loved and cared about. Yes, it is sexually exciting, and yes it is a major endorphin rush. But when I am spanked by the man I love or my big brother I feel so incredibly loved. Getting a corrective spanking always brings tears for me and a great deal of comforting when it is over. This is something I absolutely believe I will always need in my life. Don't misunderstand, I get far more sensual, play, fun and Just Because spankings than I do corrective, but I am always so grateful that someone finds me worthwhile enough to take the time to correct and get back on the right track. It also gives me pleasure to be able to help those I care about in the same way. So I have every intention of staying a spanker and spankee, I can't imagine my life without it now.

Curtis G's response-

Because I’m a delinquent, I’ll answer last week’s question and this week’s in one fell swoop or swell foop, if you will.I was probably wired for spanking since birth, but my first concrete awareness came in the second grade when a very pretty teacher picked up a classmate, put him over one knee while leaning against a wall and gave him a birthday spanking which I felt in my private parts. From that time forth all my nocturnal and many of my diurnal fantasies were about spanking. And I did what many have done – look up the word in the dictionary, find and cherish passages in books, mark movie references to and scenes of, follow the comics which featured spanking which, during my childhood were many, and, of course, listen for stories about and threats to. I think I played for the first time when I was in seventh grade, when we played games resembling house in the boarding house I then lived and I played the spanking dad. I realized I wasn’t alone the next year because of two things – a neighbor girl whom I spanked once and who then came over very frequently to put herself over my lap to be spanked and a music teacher who brought classroom discussion around to spanking about every other class and once allowed how spanking was “fun.”I was from the beginning in my fantasies and later in reality a switch, although it took me quite awhile (and with one exception) to be willing to be spanked, since I worried it would hurt in not a nice way (as the very rare parental spankings did).So what attracted me early – the teacher involved in that first episode was very pretty; the positions on either side of the lap seemed, in the mind’s eye, sexy without quite knowing what that meant except that it was spanking fantasies that provided nocturnal release. I also like the women who talked about and threatened. They tended to be those who were in their own way sassy and their threats seemed to have sexual overtones – at least to me. Also I had a particularly loveless childhood and thus spanking (and those who spanked) seemed to be more caring and warm than those who didn’t. Spanking became, in certain ways, synonymous with affection. When I started spanking early, the feel of a girl (then ) over my lap was warm and exciting, the sting on the bottom felt good and the beginnings of color (though, in play, I never spanked hard enough to make anyone red) was also appealing as was the squirming over my lap.As I grew older spanking became more tied in overtly with my sexuality. I don’t think I dated anyone whom I didn’t at least make an attempt to spank (even a one whacker) and most, but not all wanted more. The bottom is for many a major erogenous zone. So, while I engaged in play and birthday spankings, many spankings were also a prelude to sex and I enjoyed, the warmth of the person over my lap, the sting on my hand, the changes of color, the unlayering in some cases, the rubbing and caressing and the things which it led to. And when I finally relented and played bottom as well as top, it was the feeling of connection over a lap, the sting on my bottom and the arousal it produced. Unlike some I am only into spanking for fun, play, sensuality and erotic arousal, so all my feelings about it are warm ones

Paul's comments-

Purple, I can't really remember what started my interest in spanking.I am of a generation where corporal punishment was the rule rather than the exception.In the orphanage where I grew up it was used for even minor offences.To my shame, at the time, seeing girls punished at school and home was a big turn on.It was a little later that I discovered the erotic side of spanking.As I had a D D and D/s marriage discipline played a role, albeit a fairly minor one, the majority was play.So most of my memeries of spanking are very pleasent.Warm hugs,Paul.