When I went looking for pictures to go with the idea of lonliness, I kept coming back to this one. I know that from most spanko's point of view it would be considered a beautiful picture of corner time. But for me it truly expresses the emptiness I feel right now.
I feel so cold all over, my heart, my body, especially my bottom. Knowing that the New Year's Eve we planned will not be taking place and I will be alone is starting to get harder, not easier to live with. Knowing that I won't ever feel his warm, hard hand landing on my tender skin makes my eyes well with tears while that hand did nothing but put a smile on my face. This year went so fast and now when I look back I see all the lovely events and none of the problems that led to an inevitable break up.
Yes, I saw it coming but I hoped, oh how I hoped, we might reconcile certain issues and remain together. It wasn't to be. What is also so hard is at this time of year so many people come together, get engaged, make plans to be with each other always. Instead GC and I had to throw away our plans and face a rather bleak holiday.
So, as we all do from time to time, I am struggling to get myself up off the ground and back on my feet. Of course me body had to put in its two cents and show off with a terrific case of bronchitis. That of course will end and go away, and I can only hope the lonliness will to.
So my friends I know that all relationships begin and end in one way or another. Do you think sometimes it is harder to maintain a spanko relationship considering you each might have different wants and needs? Just a thought.
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9 comments:
I don't have an answer to your question. Just wanted to say hugs and am thinking of you. It's esepecially hard during the holidays.
Jean
Purple,
I am sorry that you are so sad. I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better but only time will do that. I am thinking of you and hoping that you find what you need.
Hugs,
PK
Want you to know I am thinknig of you as another holiday is here.
Jean
Hi Purple Angel
I just found your blog today. It's a beautiful blog with gorgeous pictures. I am sorry that you are going thru such a hard time. I am very new to spanking so I am not sure if my answers will be at all helpful for you. But I think ALL relationships are difficult, especially when each person has different needs and somehow these needs just do not mesh, or have a meeting point. I know what it's like to feel alone, its very painful, I am hoping that this feeling will end soon and your life will be filled with all that you desire. I wish you good health in this New Year as well as joyfilled relationships. I look forward to coming back and reading more of your beautiful blog.
Take Care
Andrades Girl
Purple, in time you will be able to smile again. For me it is six months and I still find I cry on occasion and I was the one who ended it, so it is not easy from any point of view.
Is a spanking relationship harder? I don't think so, all relationships can fail if those involved have differing needs but perhaps the difference with a spanking relationship is the level of communication. Because the communication is generally higher then perhaps you learn quicker what works and what doesn't and can take stock of whether the differences will be easily absorbed or cause real problems.
Either way, I wish you every happiness and healing.
Hugs
Mina
Learn to be lonely, learn to love life alone, live life alone. You made me cry a little bit this morning. The game of life is hard to play...kisses to you, dont put out the light.
Learn to be lonely, learn to love life alone, live life alone. You made me cry a little bit this morning. The game of life is hard to play...kisses to you, dont put out the light.
I was alone on Christmas and New Years as well, Val, and I am damned if I want it to happen next year!
Easy or difficult, let's communicate and figure something out! I believe that if we were in the same room, right now, in a while someone outside would think that some youngster was receiving hands-on guidance...lol.
Lance
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